I met a few entrepreneurs having a tough time trying to bounce back from sales rejection this week, so I thought I’d share the advice I gave to them, with you.

In sales, 9 out of 10 times you will get rejected, which can be hugely demoralising. But it’s just the nature of the game because not everyone is ready to buy. If you’re new to sales, rejection feels disproportionately worse because first, getting rejected stinks. Second, you feel you’re not cut out for sales because rejection makes you feel blue. And third, you feel helpless. To throw salt in the wound, some say great sales people need to be thick skinned.

I don’t believe this.

The silver lining

You don’t need rhino skin to soar in sales – personally I like to take care of my skin, and leathery thick skin ain’t my thing.

The difference between failure and success is not to avoid rejection, but how to bounce back. And the answer lies in the decision you make after you get the “no”.

3 ways I bounce back from sales rejection that could help you too

1. Ask a different question

After a hearing a no the automatic conversation going on in our head will tell us things like, “I’m not good enough”, “I can’t do this”,  “what’s wrong with me”, or “I can’t sell”. These are just thoughts. if we just ask a different question, we’ll come up with a different answer. Try asking yourself:

• “What did i learn from that call?”
• “How can I improve my call?”
• “What improvements can I make?”
• “How can I help this prospect?”

When shifting your focus from getting a no, to “how can I give”, you’re taking the focus off you, and direct it to someone else. And, you’re directing it to serving instead of taking. This action is powerful because, first, you’re showing that prospect you’re not just there to take from them, and that you genuinely care about helping them. Then they will know, by your actions (which speak louder than words), that you’re on their side.

Read being impeccable with your word for more on this.

2. Take a moment

Most people make the mistake of feeling desperate after a rejection and deal with it by immediately calling another prospect. Doing so carries the negative energy from the previous call, onto the next call. Because how you think affects how you feel, what you say, and action you take, so unconsciously, people are literally taking that past and putting it in the future, getting the same results, and cascading out of control.

So when you get a no and you feel down, take a breath, take a break, go for a walk or run to shift your mood and energy into a powerful and positive state. Fill yourself up with joy and positivity and only then can you be of service to others. Otherwise you’ll just repel clients and make yourself feel worse.

3. Don’t take it personally

This is probably the hardest thing to do, because it’s our own baby, right? We feel personally attacked. And then we get defensive. And then that conversation goes on in our head I mentioned earlier. You know what I’m talking about, right?

Just know that whatever others think or feel is entirely to do with what’s going on in their life. Nothing they think about has anything to do with you, because as humans, people are generally selfish and self-absorbed. Just like us, they also have internal conversations and belief systems that affects the way they see the world. So their decision has nothing to do with you or your hot new startup idea.

You’re winning

Look, you’re winning anyway. You’re in the game, following your passion, and getting no’s, shows progress. It takes courage. And you’ll learn more. For me, no’s are greater lessons for me to improve, grow, and learn. Because the more nos you get earlier is setting you up for more yesses in the future. You’re learning every possible way a person could say no, giving you the opportunity to overcome them.

Each no draws you closer to your yes. It’s a fact. And before you know it, you’ll have an avalanche of yesses.

“You don’t drown by falling in the water; you drown by staying there” – E. L. Cole

Want more?

If you’re finding “asking a different question” challenging, try affirmations for sales success. Our internal conversation brings us down, so replacing negative thoughts with empowering thoughts lifts you up.

How do you deal with sales rejection; what worked for you? Tells us in the comments below.